Simply Authentic...Your Soul Voice is Calling. I'm a Positive Person, So Why Do I Feel So Crappy?

I’m a Positive Person, So Why Do I Feel So Crappy? This has been one of those weeks. On Monday, I found out a dear friend and 2 ½ year college roommate passed away from breast cancer at the age of 52. Diane was a bright light in the world and we had kept in touch all these years, always exchanging Christmas cards and holiday letters. She had been in remission for five years before an aggressive resurgence.

It’s also been a week of personal growth and risks. On Tuesday evening I participated in my first ever Toastmasters speech contest – and placed second in the Table Topics category in District 65, thank you very much. I have a play audition scheduled for Saturday afternoon and have been memorizing and rehearsing a monologue. And we had our second Authentic Expression Wishweavers Circle tele-conference. Beings I experienced technical difficulties during the first one and arrived late to my own meeting…that was one performance I didn’t want to repeat! I was mortified. I don’t think that’s too strong a word. After all those trial runs…good grief! I’ve become much better at managing mental chatter over the years, but this week my mind wouldn’t let up. It was like a crowded intersection during rush hour traffic. I experienced a great deal of anxiety and tension in my low back, along with grief, nervousness and thoughts of “not good enough.” Yuck. It turns out I wasn’t alone in my recent experience. The topic surfaced in our AEWWC conference just like it did when I listened to the “Oh, Shift” audio blog of Jennifer Powers and Mark Tucker this morning. (www.ohshift.com.) We know our thoughts create our reality. Spinning into a negative thought pattern spiral makes us feel crappy, sometimes treat people crappy, and – even more likely – treat ourselves crappy. Focusing on the negative does no good for anyone. On the other hand, stuffing and burying so-called “negative” emotions does no good for anyone either. As Josh Pais (www.committedimpulse.com) says (paraphrased), emotions and sensations are just atoms vibrating in your body. They’re neither good nor bad. Those sensations all pass within about 7 to 12 seconds anyway, so just experience them and don’t label them as good or bad. This new understanding alone was worth what I paid for Pais’ on-line Committed Impulse class, which I recommend. If you’re nervous, you’re nervous. If you’re angry, you’re angry. If you’re confident, you’re confident. Experience your feelings, emotions, the sensations in your body as they arise. That’s not just important for actors; it’s important for everyone. Stuffed and buried emotions hang out in your body, and you really don’t want that. Nor do you want to stay stuck in a spiral of negative thoughts. It’s possible to do both. Feel your feelings and move through them. Shift up your thought pattern to one that’s loving and empowering. And then you feel better. It’s just easier some weeks more than others. And that’s okay. If you found this post helpful, please share it with your friends! Authentically Yours, Laura